Virginia Thomas Clifford

Virginia Thomas Clifford, 90, died peacefully with her family at her side on Sunday, October 16. She was a resident of Irvington for almost 64 years and an active parishioner of Immaculate Conception Church. Through the years, she was involved with the Irvington Seniors, Irvington Historical Society, Friends of the Irvington Library, and had a particularly soft spot in her heart for animals. Virginia was born and raised in Lynchburg, VA, the youngest of eight children of the late Joseph and Julia Thomas who had emigrated from Lebanon after the turn of the century. In the aftermath of WWII, she made her way north, first to Washington D.C., and then to NYC, where she worked for CBS in the early years of network television. She met and then married her husband, Cliff, in New York, and then moved to Irvington to raise their family in 1953. Virginia worked for many years as an executive secretary, first for the Foundation for Economic Education FEE in Irvington and later at American Can Company in White Plains. She is survived by her son, Clint Clifford and his wife, Leah; her grandchildren Luke, Casey, Jesse, and Charlotte Clifford; and many nieces and nephews. She was predeceased by her husband, Clinton "Cliff" Clifford; sisters Susie, Lola, Mary, and Cecelia; brothers John, Anthony, and Frederick. Visiting hours will be this Friday from 4:30 - 8:30pm at Edwards-Dowdle Funeral Home and a Mass of the Resurrection will be held Saturday at 10:00am at Immaculate Conception in Irvington. In lieu of flowers, the family invites you to make a memorial contribution in Virginia's name to your favorite charity or local animal shelter. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v\=oFf7bBSSnMw Mom's Eulogy What can I say about my mother? First some perhaps little-known facts, then some fun stuff. Virginia Ann Thomas was born in the western Virginia hills of Lynchburg in 1925. She had 7 older siblings, the oldest, my Aunt Sue, born 21 years before her when the family was still living in Lebanon. Her closest sibling was her brother Anthony, my godfather Uncle Tony, who was just a few years older. I never got details of the family's odyssey to the U.S., but we estimate that must have happened around 1905, just after her oldest sister was born. I also have no idea if it was just coincidence, or whether she was actually named after her birth state. From what my older cousin Louise tells me, mom's parents had other relatives from the old country who had already settled in Lynchburg. They owned a candy store for a time, and while growing up, the kids also had jobs in the factory cutting denim jeans. But the important point is that Virginia was a child of the Great Depression, which I'm imagining hit a small, blue-collar town like Lynchburg especially hard. Mom was not prone to extravagance, despised "waste" of any kind, and she could get by with very little - a lifelong trait no doubt borne from her years of having very little as a young girl with a large family. You shared, you accepted it, and you didn't complain. From everything I can tell, mom was the maverick of the family. She had stars in her eyes and wanted to venture far away from Lynchburg. Just out of high school, she drove out to Los Angeles with a friend to rub elbows with the Hollywood stars and seek her own fame and fortune. But things didn't work out, and they stayed only a few months, returning home for the duration of WWII. After the war, when the rest of the family moved south to Ocala, Florida, mom went the other direction again, heading north to Washington D.C. where she found a job with the FBI. She always liked to mention she knew J. Edgar Hoover personally. I don't know what on earth she did for the FBI, but I suspect it wasn't tracking down international criminals. After a couple years in D.C., she moved to NYC and this time, her brother Tony joined her. She found a job working for CBS in the early years of network TV and she had a long list of TV celebs she got to know. I didn't know half their names, but there were a few that became pretty famous in TV or later in film. My mom and dad actually met in a Manhattan bar one night in '49 or '50. Cliff was much older - 19 years difference - and they married the following year. My dad had a solid job as an accountant and we actually had a Park Ave. address when I was born a year later. Then the move to Irvington when I was still in diapers. So many young families were moving out of the city in the early 50's and when we moved up the Hudson to Irvington, it was teeming with young NYC escapees just like us. The Half Moon Apartments were just being built, they paid $1700 in cash for a 3-bedroom, and we moved in when the sidewalk concrete was still wet. Mom, dad, and I were the very first residents of Half Moon, and that's a fact. So that's the backdrop of my mom's life. While one should never complain about living the bulk of their life in a village as beautiful as Irvington, in the affluent northeast part of the country, and in incredibly good health for almost all her years, mom still had many crosses to bear. She lost several brothers and sisters at a far-too-young age, including her beloved brother Tony who had lived with us for the first few years in Irvington. We lost my dad when I was 14 and my mom became a widow at age 41. She held my dad on such a high pedestal that she never had any interest in marrying again or starting a new life. She was in and out of the hospital with my dad for many years before he passed - emphysema is such a debilitating disease - and basically had to raise me alone with one hand tied behind her back. Oh and I forgot to mention, she also lost a second child a few days after giving birth - some type of blood match problem in the hospital. She gave me a high-priced college education by basically spending every nickel she had to her name. My father did not have life insurance and there was very little left after his long illness. For anyone who knew Virginia, they understood that I became the center of her life once my dad died. The combination of an only son and a single, doting mother leads to a bond and a partnership that is hard to describe. She wanted to be everywhere I was, do everything I did, and be part of anything positive or exciting happening in my life. As luck would have it, I've had an incredibly blessed life, both personally and professionally, and have had far more than my fair share of "moments in the spotlight." She was at every game, every show and concert, and every major event I can remember. And that extended to her four grandkids - yes, she was "that grandma" on the soccer sidelines and at the Christmas concert with all us young parents, and all our Fairfield friends got to know her that way. And if I didn't think to include her in something, you can be sure she'd implore, "well, I'm invited, right?" How could I say no? As you might imagine, having a mom that won't leave your side has both its upside and downside. As for the downside, just ask the women in my life. There was always the issue of the "other woman" and sometimes, it wasn't pretty. I'd get angry about her "clinging" nature from time to time and certainly didn't always treat her as that "dutiful son" she wanted. We had a rather contentious relationship for many years, with our deep love for one another overshadowed at times with bickering and snapping at each other about silly stuff. I remember once in high school, she got so frustrated with me that she threw an opened, almost full container of milk at me across the kitchen. We laughed afterward, and I helped her clean it up. Some of the things mom was passionate about, and what many of you knew her for: Reading - until the last few years of her life, she was a voracious reader and a mainstay at the Irvington Library. She was always into one and often multiple books at a time. Fiction, biographies, historical novels, it didn't matter. For a woman with only a HS education, she was amazingly knowledgeable on so many topics and current events. My friends would often comment on how they engaged in conversation with her on so many subjects, and that was directly attributable to how much she read. Crossword puzzles - Many of you know I'm an obsessed puzzler. I actually picked that up from my mom, who would finish the NY Times Sunday puzzle in usually an hour or so - always in pen, never in pencil. Broadway and show tunes - Yep, I got that from mom as well. Growing up, my mom and dad would keep the radio tuned to WNEW AM, where the strains of Sinatra, Nat King Cole, Bing Crosby and the golden age of Broadway would be the musical backdrop of my life. She wasn't an early fan of rock and roll, and it wasn't until sometime in the mid-70's that she grudgingly admitted that "ok, the Beatles were pretty good." In later years, mom cherished her days going into the city with friends to see a Broadway show. And I waited on many a half-price, standing room, or cancellation line with her to get tickets to the biggest shows in town because, of course, we would never be willing to pay full price. Cooking - Ginny was a FANTASTIC cook in her day. And if you were really lucky, you got treated to a traditional Lebanese meal or, better yet, her famous Baklava or Baklawi, as this delicacy is called in the Middle East. I swear, I developed my notorious sweet tooth because of mom's incredible baking talents. Animal Lover - Mom was a huge lover of animals, beginning with her beloved Sam, the beagle my parents had gotten for my 10th birthday. And when I went off to college, Sam became mom's primary companion around the house. She also had a love affair with our current Golden Retriever Abby, as well as our two cats. And pets seemed to take to her just as readily. She was a sucker for animal rescue organizations, and must have gotten about 10 solicitations a month from the Humane Society and other animal groups. One of mom's only major disappointments in life was that she didn't get to go on an African safari. In closing, there are three qualities of Virginia I have to mention, each of which were repeated themes in all the wonderful emails I've received this week: Proud, opinionated, a constant. Proud - she was an intensely proud woman - proud of her Catholic faith which she took VERY seriously, proud of Leah and me, immensely proud of her four grandkids and all their talents and accomplishments, of her nieces Pat and Suzanne my cousins, Tony's kids who she thought of as her own daughters, and sooooo proud of her Lebanese heritage. And every time she described her village of Irvington to someone, you could hear the pride oozing from her words. It was as if she had discovered this place before anyone else had. My friends often referred to her as "smart and classy," always proud of her modest but impeccable attire, and proud of her amazing sense of organization and punctuality. Yes, Virginia was proud, and in the best sense of that word. Opinionated - You never had to wonder what mom was thinking; she told you flat out. She had an opinion about everything and used not-so-subtle techniques for letting you know it. I'd come downstairs after getting dressed for a night out with Leah and she'd make comments like, "Are you going to wear that tie?" Maybe this is why she was such a huge fan of Rush Limbaugh. A "constant" -- So many old friends described Virginia as "such a constant in my life." So true. Like the north star, the sun or the moon, she was always there, every day, never wavering in her loyalty or her devotion to me. She rarely surprised you; you grew to know what to expect. And she always delivered. Last thing I promise, but there is something I must read to you from an email I got this week in response to my mom's passing. As some of you will recall, I had a long-time Irvington girlfriend named Cathy Sachs - we dated throughout high school. Here is an excerpt from the note she sent me, which had me in tears. Because it so beautifully captures my mom and everything that came with her. And I quote: I remember sitting with her in the bleachers at many of your baseball games. I also spent MANY a day trying to avoid your mom. A look from Virginia could scare me quite easily. Being the steady girlfriend of your mom's one and only and precious son, was quite a job. Only now, as a parent myself, do I understand how she wanted to keep you all to herself. It was not selfish by any means, it was a mother's pure love. Mom, thank you for the purity of your love for me and for so many people you touched. I know you were always my biggest fan, but it's important that you know I was yours as well.